Kids Monologue I

[MJ Ferruzza]

I ordered the shirt with NO chili

So! I am riding home from school with Mom and my two little brothers.
I am locked in the backseat... between 2 monsters who have decided
to fight and use me as both a weapon and a shield.
Mom decides that the boys are probably hungry.
McDonald's?
Sounds good to me... sounds good to me... No! I hate McDonald's!!!
"Since when?" I ask Brother #1 "We eat there almost every 3 days."
The food comes fast and the toys quiet the boys! He must have heard this from school/
OK.. how about Burger King says Mom in the front seat.
Sounds good to me... sounds good to me.. I hate Burger King erupts Brother #2
who is just trying to parrot his older sibling.
Ok.. young lady.. why don't you decide!
Me? I get a choice? I get to make a culinary decision? I am not to be hindered
by toys, or clowns, or the taste of one french fry or chicken nugget over another?
Of course I want a sit down meal... with silverware.. and crystal... but we seem to
not have the time or growing patience for that... I pipe in... Wendy's!!!
Wendy's? What can you get at Wendy's?
Chili, I reply!
I like Chili says Mom!
Sounds good to me... Sounds good to me... and final consensus?
Sounds good to me! We are unanimous!
Mom goes through line and orders piping hot chili for all of us and Frosties...
of course, different flavors and sizes!
I want mine now.. says Brother 1 ... soon joined in by Brother 2
Mom stops at the Wendy's exit and slowly passes out the individual containers...
crackers... sthingys and Frosties.
Now... The Brother on my left is a Rightie.. and my Brother on my right is a leftie.
So leave it to fate to have them eat... elbows high.. at just the same time.. and the Chili
spills all over my shirt. The car erupted in laughter.
What happened, Mom asked, Did we not get something?
To which I replied.. I believe I ordered a shirt with NO CHILI.
I sat soggily all the way home!



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